Strength and Reassurance

Last night Dad was supposed to have Kris, whom we have never had, for his nurse but the gentleman next door required her undivided attention. He has more monitors than a pop-star. I think he was deserving of her TLC. I had arrived just as they were preparing to give Dad a bath and get him boosted in a new position for a couple of hours. I chilled in the waiting area calling Mom, per her order, and texting Courtney & Kelsey goodnight ILY's. When I was able to chat with the nurse I thought it was Dan, but he introduced himself as Justin, Floor Supervisor. Charge Nurse Dan was attending Dad before Mom left, but he was called to assist in another room also. Justin is another outstanding nurse. He was attentive to every beep and bonk on Dad's monitors. He has definitely earned his stripes as a Floor Supervisor! Kris was covering for Justin during lunch and also was top-notch at making sure Dad was comfortable.

I commented how nice it was to see so many male nurses. Justin told me there is a higher ratio of male nurses in Critical Care. Kelsey has a couple of guy friends going into Nursing. My advice for you: Go rock the world with this awesome desire that God gave you!!!

Although Dad was resting comfortably, I could not fall asleep. As I watched out the window looking to the East up Michigan Street all I could see was some slight dusting of snow. The forecasted snowstorm had passed us by. My eyes finally drifted shut about 4:00am. Dad began stirring around 4:30am! I did nod off but was awake when ex-ray arrived at 6:15am, then wandered to the family lounge. Someone's support crew was trying to find respite in a couple of chairs pushed together. Both TVs were blaring, cartoons on one and news on the other. I saw school closings listed for the lakeshore cities so I know it was snowing somewhere! I turned both TVs off. Despite the lights at least she was minus the noise. Kelsey told me last night to call at 7:00am not 6:45am. I saw 6:45am come, but dozed until 7:10am...oops. I'm just her kick, in case she hits the snooze button which she rarely does. She was moving & ready to leave for school :)

At the changing of the guard, Nurse Rob resumed his daytime duties. Mom arrived just as the doctors came in to check on Dad's progress. They scheduled a paracentesis, poking the belly with a long needle, http://www.webmd.com/brain/paracentesis-17042 for later in the day. The Heparin drip was stopped. Dad was restless and moving quite a bit. Having a sore bottom would certainly make anyone want to be in a different position! The petite PT crew was in for another round with Dad. Considering the requirements for the job, you would totally expect a Physical Therapist to be tall, 200+ lbs, with a muscular build. I have never encountered a PT with that description. They have all been small framed, with muscles from nowhere. When I look at them I think of a gymnast :) They have been great at working with Dad. They came in and worked with him 2 different times today. Each time they are increasing the time frame they will work with him. They also suggested they will look into a 'stretcher chair' to help Dad get more mobile.

During the belly tap this afternoon, they drained off 5 1/2 liters of fluid equal to 12 lbs! Mom and I thought they were just drawing off enough, like a syringe full, in order to culture it. That is like carrying around 24 cups of coffee!!! Where's the bathroom, already? Mom said he rested nicely after he returned from Radiology. I think we all would!

I always ask Mom if we can bring her some lunch or dinner from home. She is content to find something from the cafeteria that she enjoys. After her oatmeal in the morning, she is actually a fairly light eater. We savored our lasagna dinner, garlic bread, salad, homemade applesauce and cookies. I brought Mom some of the cookies for her snack tomorrow.

Kelsey and I went to Jenison to show respect to Vern, Jana, Brianna & Kaylee VanHalm, in the passing of Vern's father. On February 15, 2009, at the age of 76, Tunis Henry VanHalm joined His Heavenly Choir. May God bless your family with His sustaining grace. Jana said she had talked to her friend Gigi, who had been Dad's nurse... ??? I felt dumbfounded, then she told me her formal name was Gabriella. I reassured Jana that she was an awesome nurse! We have really been blessed with some terrific care givers here.

When I talked to Mom around 7pm, she said if Dad settled down she would leave for home before I got to the hospital. Mom called Courtney to say Jaci is Dad's nurse and is taking good care of him so she left about 9:15pm. I dropped anchor at 10:15pm. hmm...I wonder if she got Murphy's golden arches burger? I forgot to ask :)

There were 3 doctors checking in with Dad from his paracentesis today. We discussed some details. There is the possibility the excess fluid could be caused from recurring cancer, since that has been an ongoing issue, or from liver failure, or something all together different. It is definite that Dad will not be undergoing any surgery anytime soon. He is still very weak and his prognosis for full recovery is not looking in his favor. When test results do not show difinitive answers, a time will come when we need to honor Dad and give him the dignity he would desire.

It breaks my heart to not be able to have a two sided chat during the midnight hour. Dad and I have had the 'farewell' chat many times before. He has been a cancer survivor for 9 years! Being in ICU reminds us daily of 'sudden good-byes' without a farewell. Being an only child, my Mom and Dad have rocked my world with love for over 46 years! I am frustrated that our household has been a recurring petri dish of colds and sniffles, or worse. We have not spent as much time as a family with Dad in the past year because of his high susceptibility for infection. Although, we talked frequently on the telephone, sometimes about nothing and other times we were surely going to save the world! Our girls are 19 & 16 and we have never had a full family photo taken. I go back to my 3rd grade Sunday School lessons, through our prayers of petition we need to take time to listen and hear God's answer.

A greeting card from Mom's cousin Wanda inspired these words:

We are reminded that God who created us can put our world together again.

We ask Him to bring us strength and reassurance as we lean on Him and rest.